Fuck trains.
I hope you are in heaven, Walt. Chasing the bunnies and drinking out of unlimited toilet bowls up there.
All dogs are supposed to go to heaven, after all...
I'll miss you, Fish eye...Hubba Bubba..
Ugh..
Just another thing to top off my suck list of life.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Oh the problems life punches you in the face with.
Oh, My name is Shannon.
Shannin. Shannan. Shannun. Shannen.
I do not want to be ON anymore.
FML!
Today, I threw up at work, my heart started beating in the middle of my stomach, i watched Winnie The Pooh, and i realized some things need to change.
I have such an exciting life. Not. Oh yeah, and its great to know i have lost my soul and don't have love for myself.
This is not good news...whatsoever. But, i sliced my wrists last night with a razor.
For the first time in a while, i hadn't felt any pain for the minutes i did it.
Thats sad i had to resort to cutting... Since i apparently have the shittiest will-power, and enjoy harming myself.
I used to be anorexic, but i never did it to not feel. I did that plainly because i thought i was fat.
Cutting and starving are never okay.. But at the same time, i don't give a shit.
This is THEE worst i have ever felt in my life..
To have your bloody heart stabbed in your chest, ripped out, and thrown on a wooden stick in your front yard.
Not literally of course... but thats how it feels.
I won't even go into any more detail about why i feel this way, simply because i don't want to remind myself anymore than i already do.
It sucks...
I know alot of people go through these things.. Having the boy you love, not love you back enough to want to be with you. I honestly don't give a shit about my age. I know i'm young, but i feel like.. If you ever find someone you can love like that, you should'nt ever have to let them go and move on. What is the point of life if you have no love? I don't even have love for myself right now.. If you can't even love yourself, how can you expect someone else to love you? And how can you give that love to someone else. I lost the love for myself when he told me he couldn't be with me...
Trying to compose myself.
I have to deal with this though. Cause honestly...what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. I know thats like, a famous quote, and may be corny, but its true.
Deal Shano.
I value our friendship so much....but i can't bare to look at him. Not when he can be with some other girl already.
That hurts the most.... Fucccccccccckkkkkkkkkk.
Enough with this. Because nothing i have been or done the past year and a half matters anymore. I'm starting a new life, and im not looking back. Forget you Robert Michael Bown. I hope you get aids from this herpes whore and die by the time your 50. And you don't get to live your dream of being some 110 year old man doing yoga and smoking dope in your living room. Looking like some old Ghandi dude.
(I'm just kidding...i love you so much......and i want you happy forever.)
I'm just angry with you now and am pretending to wish that upon you...
But for now, Fuck you.
Shannin. Shannan. Shannun. Shannen.
I do not want to be ON anymore.
FML!
Today, I threw up at work, my heart started beating in the middle of my stomach, i watched Winnie The Pooh, and i realized some things need to change.
I have such an exciting life. Not. Oh yeah, and its great to know i have lost my soul and don't have love for myself.
This is not good news...whatsoever. But, i sliced my wrists last night with a razor.
For the first time in a while, i hadn't felt any pain for the minutes i did it.
Thats sad i had to resort to cutting... Since i apparently have the shittiest will-power, and enjoy harming myself.
I used to be anorexic, but i never did it to not feel. I did that plainly because i thought i was fat.
Cutting and starving are never okay.. But at the same time, i don't give a shit.
This is THEE worst i have ever felt in my life..
To have your bloody heart stabbed in your chest, ripped out, and thrown on a wooden stick in your front yard.
Not literally of course... but thats how it feels.
I won't even go into any more detail about why i feel this way, simply because i don't want to remind myself anymore than i already do.
It sucks...
I know alot of people go through these things.. Having the boy you love, not love you back enough to want to be with you. I honestly don't give a shit about my age. I know i'm young, but i feel like.. If you ever find someone you can love like that, you should'nt ever have to let them go and move on. What is the point of life if you have no love? I don't even have love for myself right now.. If you can't even love yourself, how can you expect someone else to love you? And how can you give that love to someone else. I lost the love for myself when he told me he couldn't be with me...
Trying to compose myself.
I have to deal with this though. Cause honestly...what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. I know thats like, a famous quote, and may be corny, but its true.
Deal Shano.
I value our friendship so much....but i can't bare to look at him. Not when he can be with some other girl already.
That hurts the most.... Fucccccccccckkkkkkkkkk.
Enough with this. Because nothing i have been or done the past year and a half matters anymore. I'm starting a new life, and im not looking back. Forget you Robert Michael Bown. I hope you get aids from this herpes whore and die by the time your 50. And you don't get to live your dream of being some 110 year old man doing yoga and smoking dope in your living room. Looking like some old Ghandi dude.
(I'm just kidding...i love you so much......and i want you happy forever.)
I'm just angry with you now and am pretending to wish that upon you...
But for now, Fuck you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)